What Japanese men do at drinking parties that are total turnoffs: “Licks faces” “Burns chopsticks” “Splits the bill evenly”

A questionnaire involving 200 single women asked if men have acted in ways that completely kill the mood when out for drinks.

Q: Have you ever been completely put off by something a man has said or done at a drinking party?

Yes 44.5%
No 55.5%

Q: (To those who answered Yes) What did they do? Why did you feel that way?

Dirty, filthy jokes

• “When drunk, he starts to take his clothes off, and tells dirty jokes” (23)
• “He wants me to participate in telling dirty jokes” (25)
• “Nothing special, but he starts to say things that sound a bit like sexual harassment… He also whispers these so only I can hear them, which was pretty creepy. After that, I never viewed him the same again.” (23)

No touching!

• “Gets touchy feely for no reason” (31)
• “Starts touching my hair” (22)
• “My coworker got drunk and he suddenly hugged me” (30)
• “A junior colleague from work got drunk and became a kissing monster, taking every chance to kiss anyone around him” (24)
• “Licks faces… I wasn’t there, but I saw photos later, and I felt so relieved that I didn’t go. I don’t like being touched by others, don’t even want to think about getting my face licked” (50)

Stupid Drunk

• “He got hot after chugging down a drink, so he tried to wrap his dress shirt over his head. But he was drunk so he was unsuccessful, and ended up swinging it over his head” (25)
• “This is when I was a student, but he got super drunk and exposed his lower regions…” (31)
• “He was being foolish and drinking chugging down drinks, so he passed out and threw up all over… We had to clean his vomit and apologize to the restaurant staff, it wasn’t much of a party after that” (30)
• “He didn’t know his limits, so he drank too much and ended up in the hospital” (22)

That’s just rude!

• “He’s only about 160cm (5’2″) tall, and I’m 165cm (5’4″), but he said that anyone over 160cm isn’t a woman. So now I stay away from short guys” (31)
• “He declared that women are all about youth and good looks” (30)
• “A junior colleague kept bringing up topic about marriage to his senior. I wasn’t put off exactly, more like cringing” (23)
• “A senior colleague at my company once said that he gave a brand-name purse that cost tens of thousands to a hostess at a club, boasting that we couldn’t afford such luxuries” (28)

Me, me, me

• “A guy that self-proclaims that he’s popular with women. I learned that not only does he boast, but he’s also not modest” (27)
• “He kept bragging, like how he only flies first class or how he works at a super elite company” (27)
• “He doesn’t work hard at all, but start to talk about his dream of starting a business and being the boss” (33)

Tough act to follow

• “He was from Kansai (known for their brand of comedy, manzai) and smacked my head at the punchline… I’ve never been hit by anyone including  my parents, it was unbelievable” (26)
• “He laughed at his own joke” (25)

Splitting it that evenly, huh…

• “Drank tons and split the bill evenly” (24)
• “Split the bill evenly, down to the yen” (26)

Other

• “Without warning, he took out his phone and took a picture of me” (31)
• “He spit, and broke tons of disposable bamboo chopsticks and then burnt them” (25)
• “He wrapped his tie to his head. I didn’t know people still did that…” (29)

Summary

The most prevalent mistakes that men made were telling dirty jokes and sexual harassment. Repeating dirty jokes or carelessly touching others will be thought of as pungent, gross, lacking common sense, and generally a bad person to sit next to. A man that offers drinks to a girl he knows can’t drink  much is also taboo. Be careful and keep those desires in check, or they may be seen as a crime.

Also, drinking too much to the point of vomiting, getting too eccentric, exposing body parts, or getting sent to the hospital will trouble everyone — not just women. Even if fueled by alcohol, rude statements or anecdotes about how amazing you are won’t win any points. Even if you’re being lighthearted about it, they also seem to dislike being touched, even if you think it’s appropriate for the moment. Don’t get too carried away.

Other things to keep in mind are that penny pinchers, those that wrap ties around heads, or those that burn chopsticks are not the types of guys that women want to be associated with. It’s not a good idea to to totally shutdown your personality to play the part of the gentlemen in the presence of ladies, but also take care that you don’t become infamous for legends you can’t even remember.

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